This article originally appeared on E! Online
Jordan Chiles is not holding back.
In her first interview since being stripped of a bronze medal due to a lesser-known rule at the 2024 Paris Olympics, the gymnast fought back tears while sharing her thoughts on the matter.
"The biggest thing that was taken from me was," Chiles began at the Forbes Power Women's Summit on Wednesday, "that it was the recognition of who I was. Not just my sport, but the person I am."
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As the 23-year-old explained, she felt that "everything that has gone on is not about the medal, it's about my skin color. It's about the fact that there were things that have led up to this position of being an athlete. And I felt like everything has been stripped."
And despite knowing she was surrounded by so much love and support, it was hard for the Olympian to appreciate it all in the early days of the decision.
"I can feel it now," she continued, per People, "but at first it was really hard to really take that in because of how badly my heart was broken."
Throughout the ordeal — which saw Chiles' bronze medal win in the gymnastics floor routine allocated to Romanian gymnast Ana Barbosu when the Court of Arbitration ruled that Chiles and her coach had submitted a score inquiry after the one-minute deadline — the Team USA member felt like she was transported back to 2018, which she explains was a very difficult time for her, as she lost her "love of the sport."
"I just felt like there wasn't a lot of people supporting me," she added, "who I thought that could support me in that situation — could help me. And it didn't feel like it. I felt like I was really left in the dark."
It also felt like 2018 for her, as at the time, she said she was "in a situation of dealing with a coach who emotionally and verbally abused me."
"I didn't have the ability to use my voice or be heard," she continued. "And that is one thing that I feel like now, in this instance of being in this situation, that I wasn't able to be heard."
Still, despite all she's gone through, Chiles is looking positively to her future.
"I made history, and I will always continue to make history," she noted, "and something that I rightfully did. I followed the rules. My coach followed the rules. We did everything that was totally, completely right."
She continued, "I do cry, I do get mad, I do have emotions. But also understanding that yes, I am a two-time Olympic champion. I am a two-time Olympian. I am a world champion. I am all those things."
And she knows that no matter what happens during her career, she's always going to "have those accolades" with her.
"I'm going to shine bright, because the star is never gonna get dimmed," she added, "and I'm always just gonna keep walking forward."
